The Otakuologist

First things first: this post is (probably) not at all accurate.  It turns out that, as I was wracking my brain trying to figure out what to post about I got to fantasizing about being in Japan and speaking perfect Japanese.

As I saw myself in my mind speaking perfect Nihongo to my imaginary conversational parter I began wondering just what I would say.  To make a long story short I typed certain phrases into Google Translate and やった！ This post was born.

Here’s how I did this thing:

I thought of a sentence I might use on the streets of Tokyo, and went to Google Translate and typed it in.  Then I copy/pasted the translation in its kanji and kana form as well as the romaji form.

Then I sort of reverse Google Translated it and copy pasted the result which is sort of the idea I was trying to get across.

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Sentence: Excuse me, would you mind if I practiced Japanese with you?

Google Translation into Japanese: 私はあなたと日本語を練習する場合すみませんが、あたが気になる？

Romaji: Watashi wa anata to nihongo o renshū suru baai sumimasen ga, anata ga ki ni naru?

Reverse Google Translation: I’m sorry if I practice Japanese with you, would you care?

Explanation: Even if you speak fluent Japanese, some natives may find it impolite if you just walk up and start speaking Japanese.  Or so I’m told.

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Sentence: You are Japanese, aren’t you?

Google Translation into Japanese: あなたは、日本語ていることではないですか？

Romaji: Anata wa, nihongote iru kotode wanaidesu ka?

Reverse Google Traslation: You Is not that Japanese?

Explanation: Most of us can’t tell the difference between most Asian cultures.  So maybe you should ask.  Maybe not, as I’m not sure what’s rude and not rude in Japan.  Anybody who knows is invited to comment and let me know.

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Sentence: Um… what’s everyone staring at?

Google Translation into Japanese: ええと…誰もが見つめているか？

Romaji: E eto… Dare mo ga mitsumete iru ka?

Reverse Google Translation: Um … anyone looking at that? ヾ(＠＾(∞)＾＠)ノわはは

Explanation: They’re staring at you.  You’re the foreigner here.  The Japanese are nothing if not curious.  Also, how about that Reverse Google Translation?  Funny, no?

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That’s all the space I have for this post, but it was too much fun not to come back to when I find myself not knowing what to write.  Expect more.

BTW, if there’s anyone out there who understands Japanese can verify any of this stuff, I’d like to hear from you for confirmation or un-confirmation as the case may be.

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